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What can I do to get the birth experience I want?

Take childbirth classes

Be sure to take at least one childbirth class that is not sponsored by your doctor or hospital. Often these classes are more oriented to teaching you how to be a good (i.e., compliant) patient than to teaching you the pros and cons of different procedures. An independent instructor will be more objective and more consumer-oriented. Taking the hospital's class is fine (and will help you familiarize yourself with their unique policies,) but don't let it be your only one.

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