Be firm

It is your job to support your wife and to advocate for her. Take this seriously. Don´t be intimidated by someone just because they are wearing a white coat. Ask repeatedly, if necessary, for explanations for proposed procedures and be sure that your wife´s voice and wishes are heard and respected. You may also be in the position of having to be firm with your own family and that of your mate. Grandma-to-be may want to witness the birth, for example, but if your wife doesn´t want her there, it is your responsibility to keep her out. Period.